Yes. My life is an everyday anguish and humilation. It doesn' t bring me happiness, love, understanding, tolerance, dates or even sex. Gosh, I' m a fucking pervert, who is too scared to do something connected with The Guy From My Dreams, because he is unattainable.

Can you imagine a situation: I know I' m fat and ugly and all people keep on lying: 'You' re not!'. And again: 'I wish I could look like you! And be like you, you have such a fantastic life!'

Yessss. Fantastic life which contains solitude, emptyness and shyness.

I repeat like Amy Lee in 'Lithium' - What' s wrong with me? Eh, it doesn' t mean a lot.

That' s why I decided to make some changes on my dA. I deleted some old stupid sketches (gosh, they' re ugly, I really cannot draw...), photos of 'nature' (my photos are beautiful like devil' s ass ;/) and old stories or poetry. I think it' s better for me, I feel shame when I look at my gallery. And I think I' ll leave dA soon. Most literature competitions say that you cannot show your work on Internet...

Well, I am defeated. Please don' t write me comments like: 'OMG, next stupid emokid. Go and cut yourself!' (I tried, it doesn' t work.) I need calmness and maybe I' ll come back to the previous, better (?) Agata-version.